An Old Saying
An old Gujarati saying:
kaman thi choodelo baand,
moh thi nikdelo shabd,
veetelo samay,
ek var gaya toh pachi pacha nathi aavta.
The second line can be generalized to not just spoken words but also actions that are committed. This line can be interpreted in two ways: you should be careful of your actions & choose your words carefully; the other interpretation would be to forgive your loved ones for what they said/did to you, they might not always mean what they said (esp. if they are angry at that time). Accept their apology and move on.
moh thi nikdelo shabd,
veetelo samay,
ek var gaya toh pachi pacha nathi aavta.
The second line can be generalized to not just spoken words but also actions that are committed. This line can be interpreted in two ways: you should be careful of your actions & choose your words carefully; the other interpretation would be to forgive your loved ones for what they said/did to you, they might not always mean what they said (esp. if they are angry at that time). Accept their apology and move on.
posted by Chintan at 10/17/2006 12:07:00 PM
8 Comments:
sometimes...its not possible to forgive wat your loved ones said/did to you...At that time its better to create distance and forget them for forever..
@anon: You might miss out on the caring and support if you distance yourself from your loved ones. This will be like holding a grudge against ppl whom you care about ... and a grudge is the heaviest thing to carry all life. Time is the best healer in such cases. With time forgive and forget. I emphasize, Accept their apology and move on
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Somethings are in your hands, while the rest arent.
Sometimes you can change what is going on around you, rest times you cant.
Some ways you can take, but rest you cant you just cant
Some people you can forgive and forget, rest you simply cant.
Its not always a grudge which refrains you to do it. Only the one who's been there, done that... would know. I completely agree that life is too short & sweet to hold a grudge against anyone. But sometimes the scars are deep. And time sure is the best healer! One should give benefit of doubt & always try to LET GO!
Something similar but in english.
http://sal-s.blogspot.com/2006/02/think-think-think.html
Keep smiling :-)
@Sal:Some people you can forgive and forget, rest you simply cant.Very well said....
Some people hurt you superficially..some deep down there.
One should give benefit of doubt but not always LET GO!
@anon: if you can't forgive someone (even if they hurt you repeatedly), you never cared for them in the first place! In such cases just forget about them and what they said. If you never cared for someone deeply, why even get hurt by what these ppl said/did to you?
If you want to hold on and also not forgive these ppl, you will torture yourself emotionally for the rest of your life.
I beg to differ here chintan....you cannot relate the past to the present..you cannot forgive that doesnt mean that you didnt care....you cared so you keot on forgiving everytime....and it is said...that ppl whom you r close to, hurt you the most...but yes, I agree that it makes no sense holding to it if you cannot forgive...and so thats wat is rightly said by anon...create distance and forget them for forever......
@Anon (last one): if you can't forgive that means you don't care the way you used to in the past (or you made compromises in the past which seem unreasonable now).
Things change and one needs to re-evaluate the depth of their relationships with time.
Digressing from the post topic: main point is to move on feeling good about the result. If relationships go south, don't abruptly terminate, 'let it slip'. It is necessary not to leave on a bad note. You enjoyed a good close relationship once, don't let the good old memories become hurt.
===
Main point of the post was to remind ppl to think before acting and have at the back of your mind: "after all (s)he's human" before punishing someone. Whether you like that human is a different topic.
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